When I married Mayra, she had two wonderful boys. I was a single father with a little two year old boy of my own. So, from the beginning, we had a full house. Trinity's birth a few years later added to the fun. There were some important decisions we had to make in order to ensure that our children could have the benefits of truly enjoying an equal piece of both parents. I wanted to share a few important points with others in the same situation.

They Are All Different

Erik is detail-oriented. Josh is sentimental. Jose David is charismatic. Trinity is fiercely independent. This means that everything from communication to discipline must be different for each of them. However, we do have to keep things fair. It's also important not to classify our children while acknowledging their strengths and weaknesses.

They Are All Important

The full experience of family includes every one of our children. Each one of them is important and each one of them should feel that way. Mayra and I make special attempts to develop relationships with each one individually as well as collectively. We also make an effort to give them the example of our love for each other, even through the bad times.

They Are All Our Children

We never allowed anyone in either family to treat our children differently. Our first Christmas together, one of my family members bought a Christmas gift for my son. Since there was only one gift, we gave it to all three. We spoke to the relative and explained the situation. She understood and now buys presents for them all every Christmas. Mayra and I both have three boys and a daughter. As far as we are concerned, it was always that way.

From the beginning, we knew that we wanted to create a real family, and we have always been determined to have exactly that. Because of our determination, we have successfully minimized the impact of the broken relationships in our past. The future is ready for them. They know that they have two parents who love them and stand ready to help them in any way possible.