I’m a pretty strict parent. Raising three boys is no joke. They try every day to push their limits, waiting for any loophole to skip out on their responsibilities. So, I keep pretty tight reigns on them. My punishments are usually swift and merciless groundings from playing Playstation, going outside, or whatever else they are into at the time. But, kids are kids, so one of them is always in trouble. Why not just give up and be a “cool” dad?

Faithfulness in the Small Things

Right now, their biggest crimes are things like lying about whether they read their school books, not completing their homework assignments, and punching each other. But, all things considered, its all pretty harmless stuff. People tell us that they are wonderful kids, and I absolutely agree. But, it’s in this phase of their life, when things are not super important, that they learn the lesson of faithfulness. Values such as honesty, responsibility, honor, respect, and self control must be established now while things are still very small.

Once day, these lessons will apply to college, employment, marriage, ministry, and so many other areas. It is during this time that they will remember all of their dad's lessons. All the groundings and scolding will make sense. Hopefully, it will even keep them from the truly dangerous things in life, like drugs, gangs, and other destructive behaviors.

Some Things Can’t Be Erased

One of the most valuable lessons I try to teach my children is that, sometimes, consequences can last a lifetime. Things like bullying people, destroying personal property, and causing someone’s death are the type of examples I use. What an aweful thing to do something so big that the consequences of it last a lifetime. One day, one of my boys complained about the length of my grounding. My response: “At least its not a life sentence. Would you like to make it one?”

I know that some people don’t agree with being too strict on kids. But, I believe that you have to balance it. Being too tough on a child all the time can cause serious trauma that will take years and counseling to deal with. But, setting parameters that your children are aware of, and enforcing those parameters swifly can make a difference between an irresponsible adult and upstanding citizen. Be sure to temper that with moments of affection and relationship-building. Mimic God by loving them with grace, but following through with the promised consequences for disobedience.

I’m not the perfect parent. But, I am pretty sure that my boys are going to be great men of God, one lesson at a time.

Tonight, as I am writing this, I am realizing that the garbage truck comes in the morning. The garbage wasn’t taken out, so I have to do it. I think I’ll let them off the hook tomorrow.

Hey – it’s not like they killed someone.